15 July 2005

Baby Steps, Really

I've been thinking about going back to work for a couple of months now. The idea totally fills me with anxiety, however. I haven't worked in four years and when I did, stress was a real issue for me. Being bi-polar isn't easy on the best of days; work -- just the day-to-day stress of it -- made functioning almost impossible some days.

About a week ago, I stopped in the JoAnn Fabric and Craft Store that I shop at regularly and noticed a "Now Hiring" sign. I picked up an application -- an anxiety producing act, itself. But I did it, and it felt good, as well as scarey. I didn't do anything with the application until Wednesday or Thursday, but I eventually got it filled out and turned it this afternoon. The sign is still up, so I know the position hasn't been filled . . .

Then, I took another baby step. I picked up an application while I was at Michael's for a framing associate trainee. This application was more intimidating, but I filled it out, a few questions at a time. (Sometimes it is so hard for me to remember that I used to be the Executive Director of a battered women's shelter/rape crisis center. How ever did I do that job?) Anyway, I got that app completed and turned in, too! Maybe by this time next week, I'll be gainfully employed!

Wish me luck!

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